Self-Assessment Questionnaire for Parents/Caregivers

1. Should I wait until my children have started school before I talk to them about sexual abuse?
- Yes
- No
That’s great. As children grow, and are exposed to others, it is important they begin learning about child sexual abuse. Giving children an understanding about their own sexuality, and the reality of sexual abuse is an important step in keeping them safe. Start the conversation early: When children are very young, you can begin teaching the appropriate names for body parts. Tell they have control over their bodies. Don’t force them to hug or give “goodbye kisses.” These are just a few suggestions. Click here to watch a brief educational video with more tips. Click hereto download a tip sheet on Typical Healthy Development. Remember, it is an ongoing conversation which starts early and continues as your child grows. There are books, videos and printed materials available for guidance. Call 1-800 CHILDREN for more information.
You answered YES…and that is not wrong! It is never too late to start the conversation. As children grow, and are exposed to others, it is important the begin learning about child sexual abuse. Here are a few ways you can start this conversation early: When children are very young, you can begin teaching them accurate names for their body parts (penis, vagina, etc.). Teach them they have control over their bodies, don’t force them to hug or give “goodbye kisses.” These are just a few suggestions. Click here to watch a brief educational video with more tips. Click here to download a tip sheet on Typical Healthy Development. Remember, it is an ongoing conversation which starts early and continues as your child grows. There are books, videos and printed materials available for guidance. Call 1-800 CHILDREN for more information.

I would never leave my child with strangers, isn’t that all I need to do?
- Yes
- No
You answered NO. Good Work. For many years, we have taught children to be afraid of strangers, but there is more to do. 95% of sexual abuse is committed by someone known to the family. It is important for you to ask questions about anyone with access to your children; this includes family members, friends, and staff at youth serving organizations – ANYONE who is in a caregiver role. Sometimes your must ask difficult questions and set clear boundaries. You should know your relatives and friends well before allowing them to watch your children. Ask if there is a history of violent or criminal behavior, drug or alcohol use, previous allegations of child abuse, etc. If you find a friend or relative is not allowed contact with children from a previous relationship, this is a red-flag. Also, anyone convicted of sexual abuse of a child should never have unsupervised contact with children. Click here to view information on choosing a safe caregiver.
You answered YES, and that is a good first step. For many years, we have taught children to be afraid of strangers. 95% of sexual abuse is committed by someone known to the family. It is important for a parent to ask questions about anyone with access to children. This includes family members, friends, and staff at youth serving organizations – ANYONE who is in a caregiver role. Sometimes you must ask difficult questions and set clear boundaries. You should know your relatives and friends well before allowing them to watch your children. Ask if there is a history of violent or criminal behavior, drug or alcohol use, previous allegations of child abuse, etc. If you find a friend or relative is not allowed contact with children from a previous relationship, this is a red-flag. Also, anyone convicted of sexual abuse of a child should never have unsupervised contact with children. Click here to view information on choosing a safe caregiver.

If my child is in camp, day care or some other child care program, do I need to worry?
- Yes
- No
You answered NO. Unfortunately, you must always be cautious. Most organizations do a good job, but you as a parent must stay involved and aware. Take a moment to download this tooland see what organizations who care for children should be doing to keep them safe. Share this information with any youth program your child participates in and ask they follow best practices. Also, follow the simple steps in this tip sheet for ideas on how to stay involved.
You answered YES. It is sad parents need to be concerned, but you gave the right answer. It would be great if you could be sure there is no risk to children in licensed child care or other youth serving organizations. Most organizations do a good job, but you must stay involved and aware. Take a moment to download this tool and see what organizations who care for children should be doing to keep them safe. Share this information with any youth program your child participates in and ask they follow best practices. Also, follow the simple steps in this tip sheet for ideas on how to stay involved.

Will my children tell me if someone is sexually abusing them?
- Yes
- No
You answered NO. That is the correct answer. Most children do not report sexual abuse when it is occurring. Therefore having ongoing and frank conversations about child sexual abuse about is important. Research suggests children who are aware of the reality of sexual abuse are more likely to tell someone. Also, children who understand the reality of child sexual abuse are less likely to blame themselves.
You answered YES. Most parents think “my child would tell me”, but this is not correct. Most children do not report sexual abuse when it is occurring. This is why having ongoing and frank conversations about child sexual abuse is important. Research suggests children who are aware of the reality of sexual abuse are more likely to tell someone. Also, children who are taught about child sexual abuse are less likely to blame themselves.

Can my children protect themselves from being sexually abused?
- Yes
- No
You answered NO. Well done. Children cannot protect themselves. Prevention works best when children are surrounded by informed adults. It is not realistic to expect children to protect themselves; it is the adult’s responsibility to keep children safe. Offenders are skilled at “grooming” children and families. They use techniques to play on a child’s innocence, and the child may not initially understand what is happening to them is wrong. Offenders may use power or threats to encourage the child not to tell. You are wise to recognize your role in protecting your children. For a better understanding of this issue, and steps you can take, watch this seven-minute video.
You answered YES. Children cannot protect themselves; it is the adult’s responsibility to keep children safe. Offenders are skilled at “grooming” children. They use techniques to play on a child’s innocence, and the child may not initially understand what is happening to them is wrong. Offenders may use power or threats to encourage the child not to tell. You are wise to recognize your role in protecting your children. For a better understanding of this issue, and steps you can take, watch this seven-minute video.

Are there signs or “red flags” I should look for?
- Yes
- No
You answered NO. Different children react to sexual abuse and other trauma in very different ways. You should always question changes in your child’s behavior, temperament, or developmental milestones. It is important to remember visual signs on a child’s body or medical evidence of sexual abuse is rare, and children may not react as you would expect. You should always be on the lookout for signs of trauma and talk- to your children about these signs. The tip sheet Recognizing Child Sexual Abuse – Know the Facts, is a good place to start.
You answered YES. Great answer. You should always be on the lookout for unexpected changes in your child’s behavior and talk to your child about these changes. It is important to remember visual signs on a child’s body or medical evidence of sexual abuse is rare, and children may not react as you would expect. You are in luck, we have resources. The tip sheet Recognizing Child Sexual Abuse – Know the Facts, is a good place to start.

Is there help if I think my child has been sexually abused?
- Yes
- No
You answered NO. Despite your efforts, it is possible your child may still be harmed. Parents often feel overwhelmed and wonder what to do next when an allegation is made. While we all hope to protect our children, it is best to be prepared in case there is a need to seek help. The first step toward healing is making a report to authorities by calling 1-877-KYSAFE1 (877-597-2331). The next step is counseling for you and your child. The tip sheet, When a Child Talks About Child Sexual Abuse is a helpful resource. Also, please take a moment to watch this educational video. You will hear the powerful story of a survivor who overcame the trauma, and suggestions from a law enforcement expert on how best to respond to a disclosure.
You answered YES. Good job. Despite your efforts, it is possible your child may still be harmed. The first step toward healing is making a report to authorities by calling 1-877-KYSAFE1 (877-597-2331). The next step is counseling for you and your child. The tip sheet, When a Child Talks About Child Sexual Abuse may be helpful. You can also take a moment to watch this educational video. You will hear the moving story of a survivor who overcame the trauma and suggestions from a law enforcement expert on how best to respond to a disclosure. While we all hope to protect our children, it is best to be prepare in case there is a need to seek help.

Self-Assessment Questionnaire for Parents/Caregivers

Self-Assessment Questionnaire for Parents/Caregivers

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